Change

Change is good most of the time…..right?  I mean, I'm the sort of girl who likes getting her hair cut, painting the house, cooking something new everyday.  But some change, well, some change is hard.  Nick and I decided it would be best for me to stop working.  It is strange, I never imagined myself as a stay-at-home mom, but I  guess that's what I'm going to be.  It's just been so much harder than we thought with Tristan, not sleeping at night, Nick not getting the hours he should be at work because he has to watch Tristan while I go to work.  So we weighed all the options, and realized it would be better and easier both physically and financially on all of us if I just stayed home.

I'm actually very sad about it.  I have worked at Grandview Family Medicine for the past 3 years, and I have loved it.  I am very good at what I do and I love doing it.  I love helping patients, even if they are crazy sometimes.  I love the other MA's I work with, and the providers.  I have learned so much from my experience there, and it's kinda depressing to think, I'm not going to be drawing blood, or giving shots, or assisting with procedures anymore.  I walked out into the kitchen this morning and said, but Nick, I love my job.  And he pointed at Tristan and said, but you love him more.  You have to realize your priorities in life.  For me, it's Nick and Tristan.  And now I won't have to worry about missing any part of Tristan's childhood, because I'm going to be right there with him.  I won't be seeing Nick as much anymore, but it's what he wants to do.  He wants to be the provider for our family, and I need to let go of my pride and let him be happy doing that.

Even though it's going to be difficult, I'm excited for the road ahead.  I will always be grateful for my time at Grandview.  For my employers who hired me with virtually no experience, and let me grow as an MA.  They trusted me with so much, and I really appreciate it.  I'm going to miss the Christmas party and dodge ball, and I'm actually sad Tristan is going to miss Santa at the Savages.  At least I'll still be able to be a patient (haha it's going to be weird being on the other end) and be able to see everyone still.

So here's to change.  May it take my family where we need to be.